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Is There A Best Way To Discipline Your Child?


I find it helpful to re-word the question and rather than child discipline, think about how best can I help my child to behave well. This is such an important topic and it sometimes appears that there are more opinions than there are experts. One does not need to look far to realize that many people have problems in this area, so I offer the following ideas, in the hope that they might help in the efforts to help your child develop a happy and well-behaved future.

By looking at how to help a child behave in an appropriate manner, it offers you the chance to cover some more general points about managing behavior, rather than simply thinking about discipline.

I believe that there are three main ‘corner-stones’ of good behavior management and they can be thought of as the 3 Cs – you need to be Consistent, Clear and Confident.

When your child gets used to knowing what you expect of them, and just as importantly, what will be the results following different behavior, they are far more likely to do what we would like them to do. So that they become familiar with what is expected, you do need to be consistent – make sure they know exactly where the boundaries are and keep them in the same place. For example, if one day you insist they go to bed, then the next day allow them stay up as long as they want, then that child is going to be confused about what you really want and so is much less likely to behave in the way you want.

It is also very important that you are totally clear about exactly what you want the child to do. It is not helpful to give a generalised message, such as ‘be good’. Instead, you should be clear about what you expect ‘do not hit others’, ‘play nicely’ and ‘do not touch anything when we are in the shop’.

Because children are so good at picking up on our feelings, you need to be confident when setting the necessary boundaries for your child. Say what you mean and mean what you say; if you do not appear sure when asking them to do something, then they are not going to be sure about doing it.

You can be sure that your confidence will eventually rub off onto your child and they will become totally familiar with doing the right thing for the right reasons.

In most cases, a well-behaved child is a happy child, so if you are having any difficulty with your child discipline, I do wish you the best of luck in getting any guidance you need to help solve the problems, before they can spoil yours or your child’s happiness.

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By: John Vine